Shaved Ice.
Roy Orbison’s Classic Song, “Pretty Woman.”
How Foolish Am I? Let Me Count The Ways.
Snow Days.
Why I Never Used My Oct. 31st Halloween Night Black Sabbath Concert Tickets.
Hyphens, Or The Lack Thereof.
Hockey.
Chernobyl.
Irritating Teenage Sons.
Being A Night Person.
Sarah Palin And The Tarred-And-Feathered Effigy Of President Obama.
Lt. Col. George Armstrong Custer.
My Apparent Inability To Count Accurately.
Hockey and Chernobyl. They just go together, don’t they?
I would like to know how much damage was caused by your inability to count correctly.
So will you be writing posts when things settle down?
Yes.
Lots.
Yes.
There, I think I answered all four of your questions succinctly and accurately.
I was going to blog about shaved ice and Sarah Palin, too.
I think my post was going in an entirely different direction, though.
I can visualize the direction you were headed. It’s not entirely unpleasant, to be honest, but I’d rather you didn’t go down that road. Imagine the potential results.
I vote you write about #3, 7, 8, 9, 10, 10(2) and 10(3). Oh, and also #1, 2 and 4. And #5 and 6. And 10(1). Yeah, you should really write about those.
Especially Chernobyl. I like reading about what didn’t happen at Chernobyl. It really explains why Ukraine turned out the way it did, don’t you think?
Poor Ukraine. It seems to have been cursed from birth. And now it’s a really large baby with two heads, three arms and a nasty case of thyroid cancer thanks to what didn’t happen at Chernobyl.
One more thing: It’s not clear to me from reading your ballot which topic I should cover first. Perhaps we have a hanging chad-type problem here, and will need to ask the Supreme Court of Blogging to make a decision. Where is the Supreme Court of Blogging anyway? (Probably in Ukraine.) (Or Russia.)
Oh, you haven’t heard about the Supreme Court of Blogging yet? It’s a real tragedy. When they annouced that The Supreme Court of Blogging would be created, everyone was so excited about finally having a separation of powers in the Blogosphere that no one really thought about the logistical problem. The USA thought it should be placed in USA. Germany thought Germany would be the only right place. A couple billion Asian people thought it should really be placed in Asia, while a few Scandinavian dudes figured it should be placed on the “Internet”. Needless to say, it was a mess.
Eventually, it was decided that The Supreme Court of Blogging would reside in Luxembourg, in the basement of the European Court of Justice, to make the Old World happy. The New World and Asia figured they deserved it, having been so nice and given back almost every colony they took during their colony-spree a few hundred years ago. Well, as I said, The Supreme Court of Blogging was established in the basement of the ECJ, away from curious eyes. Ironically, someone had forgot to plug in the internet cable in that basement. Slowly, but surely, The Supreme Court of Blogging was drowned in paperwork from the thousands of cases the ECJ deals with every year, unable to contact the outside world. It’s a shame, really, because we could have used them to solve our problem for sure.
Dammit it all, woman! We need resolution. I wonder if the League of Justice would be any help?
Snow days?
The local schools are in session today making up time!
Miss you!
In my first two weeks on my new job, I got two snow days. Wonderful!
Personally I don’t think we’ve heard enough about how foolish you are. Usually we hear about your wise side, but never your foolish side…
Ouch! So I’m not only foolish, I’ve also given you the impression that I’m an arrogant egghead, which is, in effect, just another form of foolishness? I have so much to learn, and so little time left. *Sadness* I’m not as cocky in person as I might seem on paper, or whatever you say instead of paper on the Internet.
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I don’t think you should write about that second item (I was going to say #2, but I think it is obvious that you shouldn’t write about #2. Unless you like writing about #2. Then go right ahead. I won’t judge you for it. I think I’m tired too. I’ve completely digressed. What was I saying? Oh yeah!)If you are suffering an inability to count accurately, then counting the ways you are foolish could prove challenging.
I never write about number two. Except once. You’ll find it here. I wouldn’t recommend reading it unless you haven’t eaten.
Also, by pointing out that I can’t be trusted to count accurately and might therefore have trouble enumerating the ways in which I am foolish, you have done a marvelous job of pointing out yet another way that I am foolish. I will add it to my list.
You could group the ones with a shared theme.
1) Shaved Ice. Snow Days. Hockey.
2) Irritating Teenage Sons. Being A Night Person. Chernobyl.
3) Why I Never Used My Oct. 31st Halloween Night Black Sabbath Concert Tickets.
How Foolish Am I? Let Me Count The Ways.
4)Sarah Palin And The Tarred-And-Feathered Effigy Of President Obama. Lt. Col. George Armstrong Custer. My Apparent Inability To Count Accurately.
That only leaves pretty women without hyphens.
Brilliant! Ha! And I’ve often found that pretty women don’t have hyphens.
I have no idea what that means.
I need more sleep.
Or medication.
Or both.
You could combine two of them. Wasn’t there a Russian hockey star named Vladimir “Meltdown” Chernobyl who played for the Calgary Flames in the 80′s?
If so, then his name was nothing short of prophetic. Vladimir = Russian. Chernobyl = Disaster. Flames = How the Chernobyl disaster happened. And, to my great surprise, the Flames also lost the Stanley Cup in 1986, the same year Chernobyl didn’t happen.
Hyphens? I just love hyphens.
Have a great weekend!
Me-Me
I’m not sure how to ask this question without sounding rude, but are you a pretty woman? I’d assume you’re pretty based on your avatar, but I’ve never been sure whether that’s you or Cybill Shepherd. If you are, that would be terrific, because as I said earlier– even though it made no sense to me or anybody else–I’ve often found that pretty women don’t have hyphens. You might be able to disprove my theory, although, truthfully, I strongly believe we live in a hypen-deficient society.
Here you go, Mike. I know you’re busy so I helped.
Once upon a time, Roy Orbison sang a classic song about Sarah Palin, inaccurately naming it Pretty Woman, but Black Sabbath did a remake and gave out free concert tickets on Halloween night, Oct. 31, hence the irritating teenage sons chose instead to go with Lt. Col. George Armstrong Custer, because he was a night person, and lacked hyphens in his writing, to shave some ice, play hockey and watch the tarred and feathered effigy of Pres. Obama, which due to counting the ways in which they were foolish, and their inability to count accurately, was attributed to Chernobyl.
You’re welcome.
Excuse me while I wipe the tears out of my eyes. Tears of laughter. I knew there was a way to synthesize my random thoughts. Now I don’t have to. Thank you.
It’s so hard to make shaved ice.
The electric razor keeps getting dull.
And it’s dangerous.