30 Days Minus 2 of Writing, Day 25: Fact or Fiction

Here are some statements about myself that might be fact or fiction. If you’d like, you can let me know which ones are which in the comments. Think of it as a game without a prize.

1) I am an NRA Marksman, and once shot and killed so many squirrels in a single day with gleeful abandon that my friend, a professional hunter and fur trapper named Dan, nicknamed me “Murderous Mike.”

2) I once had dinner with Suzanne Somers, former star of Three’s Company.

3) I stole a Volkswagen when I was 15, and rolled it down a hill.

4) I was arrested in Vail, Colorado for public intoxication when I was about 17.

5) I once traveled to Zurich, Switzerland with my judo team and lost a bout to a brown belt who flipped me into the air and onto my back before I could react.

6) I once lost more than 30 pounds on the Atkin’s Diet, but slowly gained it all back.

7) I was a founding member of my high school’s debate team, won a city championship and received a small forensics scholarship to attend college.

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And this completes the 25th day of hell in the 28-day competition hosted by Nicky and Mike over at We Work For Cheese. Three more days. May God have mercy on my soul.

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36 thoughts on “30 Days Minus 2 of Writing, Day 25: Fact or Fiction

  1. If some of those are fact you sound like you had an adolescence like I did. Except for having lunch with Suzanne Somers. Although I used to watch her yet-to-be-husband Al Hamel on a Canadian kids show called Razzle Dazzle where his co-star was Howard the Turtle.

  2. #4 and #7. I don’t think you “stole” the Volkwagen though, but did roll it. So that is partially true. Of course my even attempting to answer these questions is unfair as I am your sister. In fact, my answers might be completely wrong. Maybe you do live a secret life as a squirrel murdering NRA fanatic.

    • You might find this incredulous, but we were beaver hunting on this trip. It is the only time I’ve been beaver hunting, and it was fascinating. A beaver pelt is nearly round when it’s properly stretched.

      • I have an excellent recipe for squirrel stew in a cookbook. The book is over 100 years old, but I bet the recipe has stood the test of time.

        It would also be easier as we now have electrically powered slow cookers.

  3. There just aren’t that many squirrels, and if there were, they’d be too smart for you. Suzanne Somers, of course, that’s such a So. Cal. thing to have happen. Atkin’s diet. Not sure about that. Sounds so extreme.

    • I killed more squirrels that day than I can count. One, I shot through the heart. It was still beating when I bent down to examine it.

  4. I’m going to say the VW one is true – as I almost rolled mine once. Unless you mean you just pushed it down a hill. That would be too embarrassing to actually post, tho. So, I’m thinking when you said you “rolled it down a hill” that you were in it – and it turned over a couple times.

    Not believing the Suzanne one.

    I believe the Murderous Mike one – just because it’s long and you went on and on…rather like I did on my true ones.

    I can see you getting intoxicated at 17. So, yes, to that one. Plus it would probably be why you rolled your friggen VW over.

    Yes to Judo – yes to debate.

    • I was arrested for being drunk in public in Vail, but I was stopped by two policemen and ordered to pour out my beer. I argued briefly, and changed my mind quickly because they have guns and nightsticks.

  5. I remember a skit on SNL …. a short one…. a dinner table full of skeletons and one live actor… the live actor says, “Congratulations…. you successfully completed the Atkins diet!”

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